I thought I could commit my life to the study of music. But, if I'm having such a hard time focusing on it right now and I can't relish the lines, am I mistaken? But maybe this happens everytime something becomes work and not a pastime. Am I meant to spend hours alone in a room doing this? The reward of playing something beautifully and having it mean something to others certainly makes it all worth it. I just have to figure out how essential it is to who I am. And even as I write that I know that the answer is: IT'S ABSOLUTELY ESSENTIAL.
I hope this lack of motivation stops soon. Jury's next week!
