i miss you i miss you i miss you. i think this may make me sound weak, but honestly, i'm described as strong by most. but here, i choose to be weak. i miss you more than i have in a while. i wish you were here, listening to music, watching clips, laughing, reading together. i want to think of you and wonder why you did that really nice thing you did today, despite knowing why. i miss your hugs and hugging you. i miss late night visits and snacks and silliness. i miss hearing you say you'd like for me to keep you company. i miss you calling me and saying something that so obviously lets me know you care. i miss the door closing and the knock on my door that came so often that i knew it was you. i miss the small moments when i knew how you felt and i'm pretty sure you knew how i felt. i miss your energy. i miss how excited you get when you're hearing an awesome track. i miss your cooking. i miss your imagination and being closer to it than most. i miss how difficult you can be and then how you can admit to it later. i miss you on my couch. i miss that time we talked, heads close, on your bed and you asked me a question---it was so comfortable, simply nice. i had no thoughts, except what we were talking about at the time. i miss you spinning me around in the most incomprehensible dance ever. i miss cartoon e-mails and inside jokes. i miss making others feel like we had a loop only we two shared. i miss cooking for you. i miss the thoughtful things you did to make my day easier and brighter. i miss the sunlight in my room as we smiled. i miss how you told me i look good. i miss you looking good, looking tired, looking depressed, looking sleepy, being grumpy, being silly, looking thoughtful. i miss you writing essays. i miss you hugging me around my shoulders. i miss the extended looks we gave each other, jokingly, or for that special reason. i miss eating with you. i miss sponge bob with you. i miss walking with you. i miss feeling like we're falling.
i miss you. i miss you so much. i really want you here. and today, i didn't even picture whether i'd prefer him in that role, doing that. the thought came, but for the first time, i didn't care to put him in your place. i wanted you there. want you here. please be here.
i need you unnecessarily.
